baby | great expectations

when my i'm out with my son in the stroller (he's in the stroller, me. though admittedly it looks mighty comfy in there!), he smiles at strangers. he smiles at cashiers, tellers, sales associates and people on street corners.

sometimes, when we are waiting in line i can see him trying to catch the eye of the person behind us. if someone had told me that babies have the ability to try and catch someone's eye...well i wouldn't have believed them. but they do and he does. he has this sort of mild grin and i can tell he wants to break it out into a Full On Smile but it's like he needs permission (not from me, he has little interest in my attentions when we are out and about). most of the time people smile and coo at him and he joyously smiles back.

i mean, let's be honest: people love babies. i find it equally nauseating and fascinating just how much people love babies (i guess because i was never drawn to them before i had my own).

but sometimes a person is so caught up in their thoughts and what they have to do next that they don't notice my little angel staring them down. and so that half grin fades into nothing and he goes back to playing with a toy or staring curiously at the ceiling and/or floor and/or blank wall and/or [insert totally uninteresting thing here].

he's fine. i've never seen him burst into tears or fall into a baby depression just because he didn't get a smile from the postman. but i feel for him all the same! my heart breaks for him!

and isn't this all indicative of how i'm going to react when he's older? when he tries to make friends? or studies and doesn't ace a test? when he asks someone out for the first time? what about when he sings his heart out in a school play to no applause or applies to colleges and doesn't get in?

i know i'll want to shout "be his friend! give him an A! clap people clap!" i just want the world to smile on my son, is that too much to ask?

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